Mulla Nasrudin Jokes | Mulla Nasruddin Stories | Idries Shah Nasruddin Stories

Mulla Nasruddin started making arrangement for his funeral

2009-10-28T05:14:00.000-07:00

Mulla Nasrudin had become old and was afraid that he can die any moment. Nasruddin started making arrangement for his funeral, So he ordered a beautiful coffin made of ebony wood with satin pillows inside. He also had a beautiful silk caftan made for his dead body to be dressed in.

The day the tailor delivered the caftan, Mulla Nasruddin tried it on to see how it would look, but suddenly he exclaimed, "What is this! Where are the pockets?"

Mulla Nasruddin Jokes | Whom will you trust

2009-09-11T06:57:00.000-07:00

A neighbor comes to Mulla Nasruddin house asking for his donkey.
Mulla Nasruddin said "I'm sorry, but I've already lent her to somebody else."
Suddenly the donkey is heard braying loudly behind a wall.
"You lied to me, Nasruddin!" the neighbor exclaims, "Donkey is tied up behind the wall"
"What do you mean?" Nasruddin replied indignantly, "Whom would you rather believe, a donkey or your Nasruddin?"

Mulla Nasrudin had lost his favorite copy of Qur'an

2009-09-11T06:53:00.001-07:00

Mulla Nasrudin had went to another village. Late night when he came back to his home then he realized that he had lost his favorite copy of the Qur'an. Several days later, a goat walked up to the Nasrudin house, carrying the Qur'an in its mouth.

Nasrudin couldn't believe his eyes. He took the Holy Qur'an out of the goat's mouth, raised his eyes heavenward and exclaimed, "It's a miracle!"
"Not really," said the goat. "Your name is written inside the cover."

Mulla Nasrudin and father of young daughters

2009-09-01T23:03:00.000-07:00

A rich farmer was father of many young and beautiful daughters. He was trying desperately to marry off his daughters at the earliest.

One day he met Mulla Nasrudin on the way. "I have several daughters," the farmer told the Mulla. "I would like to see them comfortably married. And I would also like to say that they won't go to their husbands house without having any amount in their bank. The youngest one is twenty-three year old and she will take Rupees 35,000 with her. The next one is thirty-four, and she will take Rupees 55,000 with her. Another is forty-five and she will take Rupees 85,000 with her."

"That's very good," said Nasrudin. "I was just wondering if you have one about fifty five years of age."

Mulla Nasruddin was totally drunk

2009-09-01T13:37:00.000-07:00

Mulla Nasruddin was totally drunk and he walked upto the police sargeant’s desk.
”Officer you did better lock me up” he said. ”I just hit my wife on the head with a beer bottle.”

”Did you kill her:” asked the officer.
”Don’t think so,” said Nasruddin. ”that’s why i want you to lock me up.”

One day Mulla Nasruddin lost his donkey

2009-09-01T01:45:00.000-07:00

One day Mulla Nasruddin lost his donkey and he was crying and grieving for the poor donkey.
Some one tried to console mulla "You may have lost your donkey, Nasruddin, but you don't have to grieve over it more than you did about the death of your first wife".

Ah, but if you remember, when my wife died, then all the villagers said: We'll find you someone else. So far, nobody has offered to replace my donkey." repiled mulla

Mulla nasruddin in a Mental Hospital

2009-08-26T01:38:00.000-07:00

Mulla Nasrudin, a mental patient, was speaking with the new superintendent of the mental hospital. ”We like you a lot better than the last doctor,” he said.

The new superintendent was pleased to hear this lovely remark from Mulla and he asked ”Why you feel this liking for me"
"It is all because some how you just seem to be one of us" repiled Nasrudin.

Mulla Nasrudin and the young bachelor

2009-08-24T22:28:00.001-07:00

A young bachelor who used to frequent the pub quite often, was very proud to be a bachelor. He had the particular habit of singing laurels of his bachelorhood to all within hearing distance. Slowly people were tired of him and wanted to teach him a lesson.

One day he was quite cured of his self-centered, eccentric ideals, when once, Mulla Nasrudin got up calmly from the table, gave the hero a paternal thump on the back and remarked, ”I suppsoe, young chap, your father must have been a bachelor too.”

Mulla Nasrudin Jokes | Mulla Nasruddin getting romantic

2009-08-24T22:13:00.000-07:00

Mulla Nasrudin was talking to his girl friend and was getting very romantic. He started saying great things, about her.

Mulla Nasruddin was saying, "Your eyes -- never, never before I have seen such beautiful eyes. They do not belong to this world. And your face -- it is just like the moon. And the glow that surrounds your face, and the vibe that your presence create, it's all so beautiful -- you are one of the most beautiful woman God has ever created."

Mulla Nasruddin was going on and on. But women are very practical, the woman asked, "Are you going to marry me, Nasrudin?"
Mulla Nasrudin said, "Please, don't change the subject!"

I bear witness that you are a stupid prophet

2009-04-30T03:16:00.003-07:00

A certain man claimed to be a prophet and was brought before the Sultan, who said to him, "I bear witness that you are a stupid prophet!" The man replied, "That is why I have only been sent to people like you."

I bear witness that you are a stupid prophet

2009-04-30T03:16:00.001-07:00

Mulla Nasruddin - someone here claimed to be a Prophet

2009-04-30T03:14:00.002-07:00

A certain man claimed to be God and was brought before the Caliph, who said to him, "Last year someone here claimed to be a prophet and he was put to death!" The man replied, "It was well that you did so, for I did not send him."

One day one of Mullah Nasruddin's friend came over

2009-04-30T03:14:00.001-07:00

One day , one of Mullah Nasruddin's friend came over and wanted to borrow his donkey for a day or two. Mullah, knowing his friend, was not kindly inclined to the request, and came up with the excuse that someone had already borrowed his donkey. Just as Mullah uttered these words, his donkey started braying in his backyard. Hearing the sound, his friend gave him an accusing look, to which Mullah replied: "I refuse to have any further dealings with you since you take a donkey's word over mine."

People of the City invited Mulla Nasruddin to deliver a khutba

2009-04-30T03:13:00.002-07:00

Once, the people of The City invited Mulla Nasruddin to deliver a khutba. When he got on the minbar (pulpit), he found the audience was not very enthusiastic, so he asked "Do you know what I am going to say?"

The audience replied "NO", so he announced "I have no desire to speak to people who don't even know what I will be talking about" and he left. The people felt embarrassed and called him back again the next day. This time when he asked the same question, the people replied "YES"

So Mullah Nasruddin said, "Well, since you already know what I am going to say, I won't waste any more of your time" and he left. Now the people were really perplexed. They decided to try one more time and once again invited the Mullah to speak the following week.

Once again he asked the same question - "Do you know what I am going to say?" Now the people were prepared and so half of them answered "YES" while the other half replied "NO". So Mullah Nasruddin said "The half who know what I am going to say, tell it to the other half" and he left!

Mulla Nasruddin - How often do you shave

2009-04-30T03:13:00.001-07:00

A man was walking along the street when he passed another man with a lot of stubble on his face standing outside a shop. The first man asked: "How often do you shave?

Twenty or thirty times a day," answered the man with the stubble. "What! You must be a freak!" exclaimed the first man. "No, I'm only a barber," replied the man with the stubble.

Once, when Mullah Nasruddin was visiting a Western town

2009-04-25T04:56:00.001-07:00

Once, when Mullah Nasruddin was visiting a Western town, he was invited to attend a fashion show. He went, and afterwards he was asked how he liked it. "It's a complete swindle!" he exclaimed indignantly. "Whatever do you mean?" he was asked. "They show you the women - and then try to sell you the clothes!"

Mulla Nasruddin saw a troop of horsemen rapidly approaching

2009-04-25T04:55:00.002-07:00

Walking one evening along a deserted road, Nasruddin saw a troop of horsemen rapidly approaching. His imagination started to work; he saw himself captured or robbed or killed and frightened by this thought he bolted, climbed a wall into a graveyard, and lay down in an open grave to hide. Puzzled at his bizzare behaviour, the horsemen - honest travellers - followed him.

They found him stretched out, tense, and shaking. "What are you doing in that grave? We saw you run away. Can we help you? Why are you here in this place?" "Just because you can ask a question does not mean that there is a straightforward answer to it," said Nasruddin, who now realized what had happened. "It all depends upon your viewpoint. If you must know, however, I am here because of you - and you are here because of me!"

Mulla Nasrudin - May the Will of Allah be done

2009-04-25T04:55:00.001-07:00

May the Will of Allah be done," a pious man was saying about something or the other. "It always is, in any case," said Mullah Nasruddin. "How can you prove that, Mullah?" asked the man. "Quite simply. If it wasn't always being done, then surely at some time or another my will would be done, wouldn't it?"

Mulla Nasrudin - All the great rulers of the past had honorific titles

2009-04-05T01:30:00.000-07:00

Mulla Nasrudin - A certain conqueror said to Nasruddin: "Mulla, all the great rulers of the past had honorific titles with the name of God in them: there was, for instance, God-Gifted, and God-Accepted, and so on. How about some such name for me?" "God Forbid," said Nasruddin.

Mulla Nasruddin - I caused an entire tribe of horrible and bloodthirsty bedouins to run

2009-04-05T01:29:00.000-07:00

Mulla Nasruddin - "When I was in the desert," said Nasruddin one day, "I caused an entire tribe of horrible and bloodthirsty bedouins to run." "However did you do it?" "Easy. I just ran, and they ran after me."

Mulla Nasrudin - Deductive Reasoning "How old are you, mulla?

2009-04-05T01:28:00.000-07:00

Mulla Nasrudin - Deductive Reasoning "How old are you, mulla? someone asked, 'Three years older than my brother. 'How do you know that?' 'Reasoning. Last year I heard my brother tell someone that i was two years older than him. A year has passed. That means that I am older by one year. I shall soon be old enough to be his grandfather

Mulla Nasruddin nearly fell into a pool one day

2009-03-20T04:27:00.000-07:00

Obligation Nasruddin nearly fell into a pool one day. A man whom he knew slightly was nearby, and saved him.

Every time he met nasruddin after that he would remind him of the service which he had performed. when this had happened several times nasruddin took him to the water, jumped in, stood with his head just above water and shouted: "Now I am as wet as I would have been if you had not saved me! Leave me alone."

Source : from the book - "The Sufis" by Idries Shah

Mulla Nasruddin Grieving over his Dead Donkey

2009-03-20T04:26:00.001-07:00

When you face things alone You may have lost your donkey, Nasruddin, but you don't have to grieve over it more than you did about the loss of your first wife.

Ah, but if you remember, when I lost my wife, all you villagers said: We'll find you someone else. So far, nobody has offered to replace my donkey."

Source : from the book - "The Sufis" by Idries Shah

Mulla Nasruddin - Man of Words

2009-03-20T04:25:00.001-07:00

Promises Kept A friend asked the mulla "How old are you?"
"Forty replied the mullah."
The friend said but you said the same thing two years ago!"
"Yes" replied the mullah, "I always stand by what i have said."

from the book - "The Sufis" by Idries Shah

Mullah Nasruddin - Moon is more useful than the Sun

2009-03-20T04:24:00.000-07:00

More Useful One day Mullah Nasruddin entered his favorite teahouse and said: 'The moon is more useful than the sun'. An old man asked 'Why mulla?' Nasruddin replied 'We need the light more during the night than during the day.'

Source: from the book - "The Sufis" by Idries Shah

Mulla Nasruddin Tale - Keeper of Faith In Turkey

2009-03-20T04:22:00.000-07:00

Mulla Nasruddin - Keeper of Faith In Turkey, where some people allege Nasruddin is buried, there are HUGE locked gates at his grave site. Yet his headstone reads - "Sometimes you do not need a key to get through gates. All you need to do is walk around them as there are no walls."

Source : from the book - "The Sufis" by Idries Shah